They thought they'd be retiring. Instead, they're grandparenting full time.

Vicki and Sal Parisella are raising two of their granddaughters in Lakeland, Florida. Octavio Jones for BI

It's not the way they thought they'd be spending their older years : getting two tweens ready for school and scraping together meals from food banks.

At the crack of dawn one Tuesday morning, 59-year-old Vicki Parisella bangs on her granddaughters' bedroom doors. Silence from Myaliissa's room; a whine from Tatiana's. Minutes later, Tatiana drags her backpack into the living room.

"Your shirt's on backward," Vicki tells the 11-year-old.

As if Vicki flipped an on-switch, Tatiana zooms around the living room while Vicki's husband, Sal, packs their lunches. Vicki braids Tatiana's hair and helps her put on her shoes as Myaliissa, 13, gets dressed. By 7:20, Vicki already has a headache.

Vicki and Sal, 76, are part of a growing population of 1.1 million US grandparents 60 and older who have returned to parenting roles when they expected to be retiring.

Business Insider has spoken to more than 50 grandparents in this position in recent months. They said they've taken up parenting duties because of a child's death, drug use, or health issues. They all said they would make the decision to raise their grandchildren again in a heartbeat, though with few resources, most agreed that every day brought new financial and emotional challenges.

Noah Sheidlower spoke with Vicki and Sal Parisella over the course of six months to learn how raising two of their granddaughters in Lakeland, Florida, has changed their lives. He visited them for two days and reviewed financial, court, and medical records for this story. If you would like to share your story about grandparenting in America, fill out this quick form , and read more on grandparenting below:

The new reality of being a grandparent

I'm 63 and raising four of my grandchildren . I haven't once thought about retiring.

I'm 73 and raising 3 great-grandchildren. Money is tight — I had to unretire to support my family .

Like many of the grandparents who spoke to Business Insider, Vicki and Sal rarely have enough money to make it through the month. Vicki, who's the sole breadwinner due to Sal's kidney condition, overdrew her bank account paying rent earlier this year. The family gets most of its meals from food banks . In July, they got an eviction notice they're disputing.

But all that can wait for later. For now, Vicki has to get the kids to school.

"We're going to be late. Run to the car," Vicki shouts.

Tatiana sprints, her lunchbox flopping by her side. Myaliissa follows, not saying a word.

Sal stays home and prepares meals while Vicki works. Octavio Jones for BI

After dropping the girls at school, Vicki lights a cigarette. She calls Sal as she winds through traffic in her 2023 Toyota Camry on the way to her accounts payable job.

"I caught the freaking train," she tells Sal as she gets stuck at a crossing. She arrives at her desk with 30 seconds to spare. Crisis averted this time, she says, knowing full well the train could ruin her morning tomorrow.

Vicki can't afford to risk her job, which nets her $615 a week. Sal receives $1,435 monthly in Social Security . It's enough for the family to break even, unless something breaks or someone gets sick.

Vicki says she rarely has time for herself. Octavio Jones for BI

US Census data in 2024 showed that more than 3 million children lived in households with grandparents who had some responsibility for their care. To avoid the foster care system and give their grandchildren a shot at promising futures, some grandparents have sacrificed their financial security, retirements, social life, and physical and mental well-being.

"What's going to happen to them if I die, since I don't want them in foster care?" Rebecca Black, 63, said she frequently asks herself as a grandmother raising two grandsons in Texas. Black said she's been financially strained, but retired so she could be more present in their lives.

Madalyn Conchola, 62, said that her four granddaughters, ages 7 through 19, struggled after she adopted them . With few financial or community support resources, most of her $70,000 annual salary, plus a small state subsidy, goes toward raising them. Five years and lots of hard work later, she said her granddaughters have all been thriving in school.

"As time goes on, my age and my ability to work and earn money loom over me," said Conchola, in Arizona. "I'm looking for other ways to try to generate an income."

It's a concern that has plagued Vicki and Sal. They've had temporary custody of their granddaughters since their daughter Siobhan's relationship fell apart in 2017. The 36-year-old still sees the girls, but said she hasn't been able to get back on her feet to raise them full time.

Myaliissa has blossomed in many ways, Vicki says, including in sports. Octavio Jones for BI

"I do feel bad because of the burden of everything they have, but there's nothing really that I can do right now about it until I move closer," says Siobhan, who lives in Tampa.

That year, the family was evicted from their three-bedroom home in Lakeland because they couldn't afford the $1,143 rent. They moved to a Salvation Army shelter and were able to get by with assistance from her coworkers and Vicki's sister, Nicole Spottke.

"They're both incredibly patient. They get frustrated, as would anyone who's exhausted does, but the girls are raised really well," said Spottke, 55. "Vicki would like to be able to give them more financially, but truly, I wish she'd get it through her head that the time that she gives to the kids — that's so much more important."

After two years, they were able to rent a home with a small pool, enough room for the girls to run around, and a quiet space for Vicki to decompress. The house wasn't without its problems —mold, flooding, and broken appliances — but for five years, it did the job. Vicki said their lives slowly improved.

When that house sold two years ago, they saw a huge re...

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